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Do I Need To Ask Her Family’s Permission To Get Engaged?



Many people find getting engaged to be quite stressful. Not only is there the actual task of proposing, there are lots of other things to think about. One thing that many men find stressful is asking her family’s permission to get engaged. However, this is a very traditional step. In many cases, young couples today skip this step. If you find yourself shopping for engagement rings, you may consider whether or not you want to ask for her hand in marriage. While there are many benefits in asking, there are plenty of reasons not to as well.

Pros of Asking Permission To Get Engaged

One of the biggest reasons in asking permission is that a marriage will combine two families. Once married, you will have a new mother-in-law and father-in-law. For many parents of the bride, asking is an important step because it helps develop trust. In many cases, asking permission is simply a formality. Unless there are extenuating circumstances, many couples will have met each other’s parents before getting engaged. In these instances, asking should be a simple step. Additionally, the bride’s parents often contribute to paying for the wedding ceremony, and they may feel they deserve input. Finally, asking permission shows respect to her parents in a very traditional way, and this is important to a lot of families.

permission to get engaged
Consider the pros and cons of asking her parents before popping the big question.

When Is It Acceptable Not To Ask Permission?

While many future grooms do ask the bride’s parents, there are plenty of cases where it is acceptable to not ask. The obvious ones are when her parents are no longer around. However, millennials are more likely to move way from their hometown than ever. This can present some logistical issues. Additionally, independent young women may look down on the tradition of asking– the only permission they need is from themselves. Whether you decide to ask for permission to get engaged or not, think the decision through. Even if she doesn’t have parents, she may have grandparents or siblings that would appreciate a heads up. Finally, if you plan on eloping, then you probably do not need to ask either.

No matter what you do, be sure to plan out your proposal ahead of time. Be sure you properly budget for an engagement ring you can afford. Also, designing a custom ring just for her might be the best way to show you’re serious. When planning to get engaged, the best decisions are going to come from honest discussions with your partner. These will help you answer the important questions like whether or not you should ask for permission to get engaged from her parents.

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